I began this blog when I was 23 years old and my husband, Jesse was only 21. That was in December of 2007 when we decided that we wanted to bring a baby into our family. We had no idea all that decision entailed. Back then I had a false assumption that I was super-fertile and would get pregnant even while on birth control. Well, I was off of birth control for over a year, went through all of the fertility testing, and then was diagnosed with "unexplained infertility".

This past year has been one of the most difficult I have ever been through. I ran the emotional gauntlet on this issue, ranging from intense sadness and heartache to anger towards God to total peace about what He is doing. God began to show me how He was using my infertility as a ministry. It is my hope to share my testimony with others so that they may either be encouraged as they face their own infertility or educated as they learn what infertility entails. More than that, though, I hope that the things I share point others to God regardless of what they are going through.

When I first began this blog, the entries were kept private. But I have decided to open everything up in order to let people see the raw truth of the struggle. I strive to find the fine line between sharing the truth and sharing too much information. However, it is my desire to share my heart, regardless. And I have learned that there is never "too much information" in the world of infertility.

After being diagnosed with unexplained infertility on November 17, 2008, I was put on a round of 50mg of Clomid to strengthen the quality and quantity of my eggs. I suppose it was how God chose to work because I became pregnant that very cycle.

In order to be sensitive to those who are still going through infertility, I have opened up a new blog about my pregnancy. I am maintaining this one, though, hoping that it serves as a testimony to anyone who may be going through infertility at the time they come across my site. If you want to follow my life's journey, check out my other blogs. And if you would like, please don't hesitate to email me:
mrs_peterson07@yahoo.com

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Wednesday, Rain

These song lyrics just meant a lot to me tonight. I'm not sure if I can say these words with 100% honesty in my heart. But it is my desire to be able to surrender it all- to say that I'm willing to not only endure the drizzle, but to say "Bring it on" to the storms if that's what it takes to praise God.

"Bring the Rain"
by MerceMe

I can count a million times
 People asking me how I
 Can praise You with all that I've gone through
 The question just amazes me
 Can circumstances possibly
 Change who I forever am in You
 Maybe since my life was changed
 Long before these rainy days
 It's never really ever crossed my mind
 To turn my back on you, oh Lord
 My only shelter from the storm
 But instead I draw closer through these times
 So I pray
Bring me joy, bring me peace
 Bring the chance to be free
 Bring me anything that brings You glory
 And I know there'll be days
 When this life brings me pain
 But if that's what it takes to praise You
 Jesus, bring the rain
I am Yours regardless of
 The dark clouds that may loom above
 Because You are much greater than my pain
 You who made a way for me
 By suffering Your destiny
 So tell me what's a little rain
 So I pray
Holy, holy, holy
 Is the Lord God Almighty


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